You'll never become the priority; life isn't that nice and that guy (or girl) you're dating will always be a jerk.
At one point or another, you've been on someone's hook.
You think that one day, all of a sudden, this person will turn around and put you above everyone else, and it will somehow morph into a perfect relationship.
"If you have ADHD, you need to find the right treatment (whether that's medication or another therapy), be willing to stick with it, and find accommodations so your environment is more conducive to your productivity," Barkley says. It's about managing the disorder effectively both inside and outside of the relationship for life.
If you're the partner of someone with ADHD, it's crucial that you also support their treatment program and educate yourself about the disorder.
Russell Ramsay, Ph D, co-director of the Adult ADHD Treatment and Research Program at the University of Pennsylvania, tells Buzz Feed Health.
It's easy to misinterpret symptoms for carelessness, lack of interest, unreliability, or just being a bad partner.
So if you have four or more of the DSM symptoms or notice all of these patterns and issues below in an otherwise healthy relationship, Ramsay says, you may want to consider contacting a psychologist, psychiatrist, or neurologist who can provide an ADHD screening.
ADHD manifests differently for different people, and, of course, no two relationships are the same, so not everything here will apply to every relationship where ADHD plays a role.
And then suddenly, everything changes," Ramsay says.
"When you move to the commitment phase and you start to develop a routine of interdependence, that’s when you notice the 'consistent inconsistencies' in the partner with ADHD," says Ramsay.
Their partner can feel burdened, ignored, disrespected, unheard, and misunderstood.